Do you even resolution, dude?

Well, Christmas is over… trees and decorations are beginning to be stored (mine has been down since Christmas day night.. hahahaa), money is starting to go back onto peoples well-used credit cards, shelves are beginning to be re-stocked, and all the boxing day sales are in full-swing.

I love Christmas lights. Not having lights on in my house is one of my favorite things, and at Christmas, that goal is always met. It is just so comforting to sit in the living room under the glow of your tree. But I am not going to lie, I quite enjoy the cleanliness that accompanies an un-decorated house.

And with the clean houses and boxed up sparkly shit comes a whole other season – resolution season! When people vow to be better, smarter, skinnier, healthier, kinder, funnier, more outdoorsy, spend less time online, spend more time with their kids, read more, laugh more, learn more, do more, love more, hate less… bla fucking bla.

Did you know that more than 80% of all resolutions are broken by February 1st? I am sure that number is incorrect (because I just made it up without the nuisance of actually researching it… hahahaha… maybe I should resolve to be more sleuthy) But I do know that a great deal of them fall by the wayside before Valentines Day.

Why? What the hell is so wrong (and difficult) with being a better person? Why must we resolve to not suck, and then why must we suck so hard that we forget about our resolutions and just become our old shitty selves? WHY!?

Okay, maybe not everyone is a shitty person, sure. But I still think that people should all try to be better. And not just because it is January 1st. Who gives a flying shit-wheel what day of the year it is.. don’t suck and don’t be a shitty person!

What are your resolutions this year? Do you have any that don’t drip of typical cliché?

Me? I don’t really do resolutions. I try to be a better version of me every single day. And it doesn’t always work out (which is leading me to believe that I am so perfect that there isn’t anything to fix… LMFAO! Sorry, excuse me while I clean myself up, because I just laughed myself silly)

I think resolutions are good for getting people up and off the couch, for sales at bookstores and fitness stores, for the membership desks at gyms… but I am not sold on the entire premise. January 1st just means that you need a new calendar (for real, do people even use calendars anymore!? I do, cuz I am a mom and that’s what we do.. but normal people? Calendars? Anyone!?) January 1st does not mean that you need to completely change who you are. I do enjoy that people try to be better – I just wish it lasted for more than the coldest month of the year. Perhaps that is the problem – people get sick of bettering themselves while their lungs are aching from the cold and their nostrils at freezing shut. This year is not cold though people, so you just lost your excuse!

Honestly though… I want to read more, I want to get my book published, I want to go back to school, I want to be a better mom, a better wife, a better friend, a better person, I want to travel more, I want to expand my vocabulary, I want to learn Italian, I want to beat my thyroid and lose this fucking weight once and for all… some people see these as “resolutions”… I just see them as a checklist to be my best self.

resolution: the act of finding an answer or solution to a conflict, problem, etc

I do not see myself as a “problem” that requires fixing. Perhaps therein lays the problem – people need to stop seeing themselves as problems, and just start trying to be happy.

“Problem” solved.


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